catching up...

Lets start with Thursday....

I got up that morning and headed off to the doctor. Not a bad visit she prescribed me some sleep meds. Can you say, wonderful. Finished packing for the retreat (Walk with Christ) I worked this last weekend. The we all loaded up to head for Spokane.
Abigail had an appointment with child neurology and then they dropped me off at the walk location. The neurologist let us know that she had bi-lateral temporal lobe damage. For you non-medical folks basically she has the potential of having learning problems is the future. He also let us know that if speech therepy is suggested we need to get her into it sooner rather than later. Then it was off the the Social security office to get a new card for Abigail (kinda wishing we would have gotten mine at the same time). That took awhile but thanks to Palouse Pediatrics faxing the information that proved Abigail's identity we were able to get the card. Ironically we were asked twice if Abigail had picture ID. We are thinking about going down to the DMV to get her in ID just for the fun of it. Then they dropped me off at the walk location.

Friday, Saturday and Sunday are a blur but here is what I learned during the weekend....

1. How to skuip (no not misspelled) only a few get it but seriously funny
2. I look angry when I am thinking or not talking
Everyone kept asking me what was wrong when I wasn't talking. I know I like to talk and socialize but even butterfly's need to rest.
3. Making decor is a lot of work
4. Get women tired and we will discuss and laugh at the funniest things
5. Chocolate and Coffee gifts from God to us.

Today...

Today was a good day. I was able so sleep in due to my wonderful husband having the day off. We both had a visit with the dentist and we are looking good :). I had the bonus of being able to visit with all my old co-workers too. After the dentist I met up with Nicole for coffee. While visiting the wonderful Daily Grind we ran into Brittany and Danielle. After coffee we ran to paper pals one of my favorite stores. Shawna was working and intoduced me to this new craze called Bento. A few examples:

Seriously, these people have gotta be mad. It is a Japense tradition of how to do portion control. Portion control is one thing but this is crazy. This is gotta be time consuming and this is only one meal. There are some not so elaborate ones that appear more reasonable but I had to show these ones.

After this revelation I droped off Nicole and we went Geo chaching. Oh so much fun. However, we have to go out again b/c this stupid cash has remained unfound :(.

Pondering

So it is almost 1:00am and I am left restless again. I was thinking maybe it was the caffeine but I have had precious little caffeine today. In fact, I can’t even say I had one full can of diet soda. It could be the issues I am currently facing in life but, that would not explain the good news I received today. So, I sit and I ponder… why? Why can’t I sleep? Of course, that leads me to ponder other things. Like the fact that my baby is almost a year old. In two short precious weeks my baby will become a toddler. My goodness this year has gone by fast. I feel robbed of month nine and consequently ten and eleven too. It feels like yesterday I was anticipating her arrival. Although I have been looking forward to this first birthday for awhile it feels like I have not been waiting long enough. She has learned to crawl and now walk. She has teeth and can almost talk. She is growing up and soon my baby will no longer be a baby. If this year is anything like those to come she will zoom past the toddler years whiz past early childhood and before we know it she will be a full fledged adolescent with adulthood creeping around the next corner. I wonder if we will teach her what she needs to know. I wonder if or better yet how I, as her mom, will fail her. Will she love God? Will she save the world from some impending doom? I know God spared her life for a reason and I have to wonder what miraculous things are planned for her. I am filled with emotion sad b/c her last weekend as a baby I am going to be gone and yet stangely excited about what is to come. Perhaps, this is why I can’t sleep. Perhaps it is because I have learned that every second is precious even the ones were her eyes closed and she is dreaming. At least I can spend another second with my baby as baby before she becomes a toddler.

Revelation

Valentines Day this year was unlike any other. It was not because this year we had a baby in tow but because we spent it unlike any other. The days leading up to Valentines Day and the day itself were filled with dealing with getting our finances in order. Not exactly what I would call a fun job but one that has to be done. I was feeling like Josh and I had failed and like we have dug ourselves a hole so deep that we could no longer get out of it. This is how I felt. I have since seen God working in some amazing and extraordinary ways. God showed me in December that He will take care of my daughter. He showed me that He has a special plan for her and dying was not it. Now God is showing me that He also cares deeply for us. In what I felt was failure and hopelessness He has given us friends and family who are not judging but coming along side of us with understand and love. He has placed in our lives choices to deal with our obstacles however, I am filled with fear. I am filled fear that we will fail ourselves, our friends and mostly God. Josh and I truly have squandered a little and I am afraid that it can not be unlearned. I am afraid that we are not qualified… And then I am reminded that God does not call the qualified He qualifies the called! I know that God is calling us to be good stewards of His gifts and He wants to see us succeed in basics of life. I also know that He already knows what we will do. He knows if we are going do as we have promised ourselves or if we fail. Oh how I wish I knew too.
As decisions about things are coming up I truly do pray that I make the right decisions for my family and I follow what God wants of me. As I ponder and pray I am reminded that there are times and seasons in life. The season Josh and I are in is one of storms and deep dark clouds. You know the kind of clouds you see and wonder if you will survive the upcoming storm. Yet I am also filled with great anticipation of what the storm will bring. God is showing me day by day that He is going to help us weather this storm that He is going to help us through to the promised rainbow at the storms end.

Book review

Almost a year ago a friend suggested I read "Marley and Me" by John Grogan. Well I am finally getting around to "reading" it (gotta love audio books). It is hilarious! Let me set one of the most hilarious scenes for you. A family of four goes for a walk with their 90lb lab in a beach front a priced neighborhood. You know the kind of neighborhoods were the people don’t own any animals over 20lbs and certainly not a lab. In this neighborhood there are restaurants were tables are set up outside so those walking pets can also enjoy a meal. The day is going well so the family decides to partake in one of these restaurants. They sit down and they tie the 90lb lab to the what they see as a very sturdy table. They order drinks for themselves and the kids. It is looking like a particularly nice afternoon when the family dog sets his eyes on something he wants; a poodle a few tables over. The table they are sitting at is soon whisked away as and the seemingly innocent family pet races for his object of his desire. If you can imagine the crashing of tables and most importantly the look this family's faces and everyone else’s as this large animal destroys the setting. If that is not funny enough the wife (one of said labs owners) responds to the situation in a tone that would make one think that this normal and happens everyday. I am not quite as eloquent as John Grogan but you get the point. However, I must warn that there are a few sad parts in the book to include the beloved family pets passing. Overall, a good "read". I will have to thank my friend for suggesting it.

A Reminder on Valentines Day…

I woke up this morning to the item pictured below resting on my computer. We didn’t have the money to buy each other a gift this year so he made me this. I was reminded of how much my husband loved me. Not because of the words he wrote (which were sweet too) but because of the time and energy he spent making me this gift. We have been blessed by having love. Not the cheap kind but the kind that is deeply rooted in friendship. Josh and I are hard to explain and sometimes I don’t really get it. We fight (hello most couples do) but no matter what I know he isn’t going anywhere and he knows neither am I. Whenever I wonder how I snagged such an amazing husband I am reminded that Josh was God’s plan for me. I guy big enough to deal with getting picked on occasionally and patient enough to deal with all my issues. I am not always good and letting God take the wheel of my car of life. In the case of my husband God gave me above and beyond and I am so glad I didn’t interfere with His plan.

Oh the joy...

of issues. I don't want to go into them all here on a public domain but I seriously wish I was smarter then what I am. Well, enough of a pitty party for me. LOL Abigail is doing well she had pajama Wednesday b/c of all the stuff we meaning me and Josh had to get done. We looked at a place today that was pretty nice. It was a three bedroom which we would like if that is at all possible. Places around here are not exactly cheap so we will see. It had new carpet and direct access to the back yard (big plus). The kitchen was still small but not badly set up and it had a dishwasher (again big plus). Abigail first Valentines Day is tomarrow we are going to go for a walk but that is about it. I will however have to take a cute picture.

The Invitation for Abigail's Fairy-Tale Unicorn Party

I have completed the invation! I sent one to Walmart to get a proof before I had the large batch printed. It turned out PERFECT!! I am so excited. She is going to have a Fairytale Unicorn 1st birthday party. We were originally going to do a carebear 1st birthday but they went and discontinued most of the products. I was still going to make it work but Josh liked the "purple unicorns" better. He did not find me telling everyone this as funny as I did but hey it is pretty dang funny. I don't want to give away too many details just in case I change my mind. But lets just say it is going to be fun!!! Here is a pic of the invite; the details are blocked out, but you get the idea.

Rearranging!

We are moving furniture. Did I mention I hate this task? Really it is only b/c it involves cleaning and I really hate cleaning. Well onto finish the job…

The moving is done (for now). Only took us about four hours. I like our new setup. Josh and I are able to sit right next to each other and type away at our computers. It also gave bug more room to play. I have lost my kitchen table to the computers but to be realistic... I never really have had it anyway.

Oh the joy of planning...

Because I am going to be gone the weekend before Abigail's first birthday I am in super planning mode. LOL I have food figured out, invitations, gift bags are almost done, games (except an ice breaker), location is picked out, cake type is picked out, decorations are almost all picked. So in retrospect I have a lot done. That is simply a pat on the back for all the things left to do. Like settle on ideas and puchase the supplies. It is a good thing I have a month.